11Aug 23, 2024
I wash Adam’s feet almost every day, soaking the diabetic’s precious, never-ending walk, his steady, vulnerable progress, in tender keeping, using a home remedy I found online, a mixture designed to slough off dead skin and soften calluses. You wouldn’t believe it maybe, but mouthwash features in the short list of ingredients, and so, the […]
12Aug 9, 2024
“Riley, before I met you, I was all alone,” Josh says gently, his voice a quiet trumpet. He stands in the middle of our Baltimore hotel room, gesturing toward her with one hand clawed around a balled-up t-shirt. The thought has made him pause in his packing, as though it must be acknowledged before he […]
13Aug 2, 2024
On the phone, the cheery woman from Miracle League Baseball (MLB) asks, “So what do you know about us?” Given Adam’s particular interest in baseball, I had filled out an online application for him. I relay to the woman what Josh, having played for years, has told me sometimes half-grumble, that in an MLB game, […]
14Jul 12, 2024
Adam’s delight. This my friend—my sister—texts after looking at the pictures from our trip, just those two words and a series of hearts, having arrived in seconds at the treasure I will carry with me long after even our memories of summer have faded. Adam’s delight, that wild smile stretching wide across his lean face, […]
15Jul 5, 2024
I had asked God to help me see the people around me, even at the theme parks, even as we thrilled through the rides and managed the crowds, even waiting in lines and eating carnival-style food on the fly, even sweaty and wet and foot-sore at the end of the day, that I might have […]
16Jun 21, 2024
Unprotected, that’s the word my friend chooses. I feel unprotected. I cradle my coffee mug, sipping, immediately drawn to that word as my mind spins to its opposite, making a connection, like a jagged line across the page. My friend has been describing a problematic relationship, how vulnerable she feels every time the potential for […]
17Jun 14, 2024
I looked pretty bad, on paper, that’s my thought, tears clinging to the bottom edge of my jaw like dew drops on a limb, Adam’s chilly fingers reaching for my ear, saying, love love love, asking tentatively, in his silent, tender way, if I’m okay. But listen, I’m actually better than okay today. I glance […]
18May 24, 2024
In the predawn, I spread my journal open on my lap, smoothing the pages, pressing tape down to affix to the blank page a card I received for my birthday. Slowly, I reread every word, tracing the curling signature with my thumb, determined to actively take hold of love. There will be days when I’m […]
19May 3, 2024
“No Band-Aid. Not right now. I don’t like it,” Adam says, the ‘don’t’ coming across pointedly, as though Riley might otherwise misunderstand the rising volume, the sharp tone, in which he speaks. She kneels in front of him, her knees pressing into the floor, brassy hair swinging against bright cheeks, gently tugging at the heel […]
20Apr 19, 2024
In the late afternoon on Maundy Thursday, I crash, feeling my own slow crumble as I curl into a corner of the couch and tentatively flex, cataloguing the cramps in my feet. Sometimes, as I consider the years stretching on and no end in sight to the needs in front of me, I feel a […]