111Mar 24, 2017
I find her note on my desk. It’s just a yellow sticky note written in ballpoint, but the print is her own. I can almost see her hand gripping the pen. That’s it, a small, blinding-bright effort to encourage, inspired by some of Ann Voskamp’s ideas for living given I’ve slapped up on our refrigerator door […]
112Mar 17, 2017
Finally together at the end of the day, and the murmur of quiet activity is grace. Riley sits with her feet tucked under her at the bar, giggling over a word that twisted in her mouth when she said it, all those wispy, mussed hairs falling golden around her cheeks. Zoe saunters in on sock […]
113Feb 17, 2017
In the waiting room, she reaches for my hand, lacing her long fingers through my own. She presses her palm flat against my palm until all the lines meet, intersecting for a stretch and then contradicting, all posts and crossbeams. Her moon eyes speak paragraphs over still lips, tightly drawn. They are imploring blue–those eyes, […]
114Jan 27, 2017
Standing there elegant in front of us all, she says to him, “I choose love. I choose you. I choose the wonderful things about you and the things that drive me nuts. I choose the good days and the bad ones,” and her voice doesn’t even quaver. She is radiant with chosenness, and it strikes me that […]
115Jan 6, 2017
She gets up for me when it’s hard for her even to walk the length of the floor, and balancing on the one healing side, she hugs me, when I know it hurts to be touched the wrong way. I’m on the way home to a lot of doing she couldn’t now do if she’d […]
116Nov 4, 2016
I can hear them from the kitchen. Their laughter–giddy, riotous–bounces and floats, and every so often I catch a “yea, and–“, just the edge of a phrase, the words pointed and stretched for diving in. They have left this solid, dusty, hungry place for another realm, for a place where garden fairies dressed in glittery leaves co-exist […]
117Oct 28, 2016
I just want to feel better, she says, looking at me with those eyes–wide, blue like crisp Fall; those eyes that still say Mom, fix this, please, even though we’re both well past the point of believing I could actually do that. Her bookbag thunks to the floor and she tugs at her skinny jeans, […]
118Oct 21, 2016
Travel weary and temporarily keyless, we knock, feeling as dusty as the door, as parched as the plants. I run my thumb along the delicate thinning edge of a swooping leaf, crisp and browned, like old parchment. On the door, the vinyl letters have broken in places and begun to curl away, even as they still […]
119Sep 16, 2016
“I love you.” He says it slowly, the way he says everything, but lifting the word you, as if in emphasis. It’s not enough just to fling the words into the air above her head and walk away. He knows this. Purposefulness has been a recent goal. So instead, Adam bends his lean frame toward the […]
120Sep 2, 2016
Twinkle lights cast warm light over their cheeks, their tawny skin, their sun-gold hair. The summer breeze lifts long, errant strands—mermaid-streaked deep maroon-purple, steel blue. The girls slide their thumbs over their foreheads, corraling without thinking. As the day fades along the edges of the dinner hour and the five of us gather on the […]