In the beginning, nothing.  I stand at the edge of a wide, blank canvas.  From the street, as the first light cracks open the sky, I only see a broad, smooth, sandy plain, and beyond this, a dazzling sheet of silver glass.  For a number of days, I disconnect everything and step away, wiping it […]

Friday morning, while the light’s still new, Adam slides his Father’s Day gift out of hiding. “Play golf,” Adam says, pausing the game he’s playing on the Xbox, sauntering over to where Kevin and I stand talking, dropping the words like a couple of coins in Kevin’s palm.  Adam watches our faces, looking for something–a […]

“—Hey, are you listening to me?” I pause mid-sentence, asking because I know what it is for him to listen.  I know the impossibility he faces, without the ability to deafen distractions.  And I’m telling him what will be, things he’ll want to have heard, mental notes he’ll want to keep. “Yes,” he says softly, […]

“So tell me everything you would like to do this afternoon,” I say, pulling a capless pen from the chipped bisque mug on the desk, sliding a notepad in front of me.  Pansies float around the edge of the paper.  The impressions of Adam’s carb counts from breakfast dent the blank top page, making a […]

In the morning, he puts a cup in my hands, french-pressed and steaming, the flavor deep, and I sip, letting the new day develop.  My chilled fingers begin to warm to the living ahead of me, living that surely overflows the banks and spills, splashing.  I crack the blinds and watch light overtake darkness, slowly, […]

Adam sloshes the rag around the sink, holding a corner with two fingers, dragging the cloth by the neck like some vile, unwanted thing.  He tried to convince me we did not have to do this.  “Already clean the bathroom,” he said, and on the floor, I could see an antibacterial wipe that missed the […]

She spreads the towel smooth with her fingers, dropping it gently across clean things still drying.  She dabs her fingers on the corner of a paper towel, turning to examine the countertops.  “Let’s see…is there anything else?”  She says this to no one, speaks it softly to herself in the quiet.  Ever since she found […]

Clutching the mug–round, steaming, creamy-warm, in the snug space between twinkle lights and the gentle glow of dawn, I push back my chair, leaving the porch with its weathered slats and plump, happy cushions.  The house feels still, dark, lightly chilled from the brisk morning.  Just past a silhoutted wave to father and daughter on […]

She says it like it’s a thing you have to say to feel good about the day: Alright then, so I am pre-pared to be amazed. Her voice falls heavily on the two most important words in the sentence, prepared and amazed, and of course, she draws my attention. I roll back from my desk and turn, […]

“Breathe out,” she says, “and imagine that you’re breathing out through the bottoms of your feet.” It’s Christmas-crazy, and I need this. We’re sitting on the floor, a whole clotted bunch of us worn women.  I feel them all around me; I can hear them breathing, the slow draw in, the release, but I can’t […]