151Feb 21, 2020
Beside the auditorium door, Adam sways, a reed gently tossed, rooted at the feet. For Adam, this represents an attempt at stillness, this planted shifting of weight from foot to foot. I glance at him and smile, and he bends a lengthy arm, touching his name tag with the tips of his fingers, moving a […]
152Feb 14, 2020
At the dawn of day, while yet the dark of dying night redacts our view, I huddle in the chair by a flickering fire, coffee cup warm on my fingers. The one hand cradling, the other cupped to receive, my heart turns to prayer. I worship; I confess; I give thanks; I ask, withholding nothing. […]
153Feb 7, 2020
It makes me want to hide. I type the words–vulnerable, the most honest ones I can offer, into my text to Kevin, curling my phone in exactly the way I want to curl myself, further and further away, until I’ve hidden all the tender parts of me. This day, so heavy with life, feels so […]
154Jan 31, 2020
Home from a walk and still smelling like outside, that fresh blend of newborn and dying things, we walk into the living room. The Winter chill still pinks our cheeks. I know, because I see it still blooming on Kevin’s face as he shrugs off his extra layers, as I bend to plant a light […]
155Jan 24, 2020
After dinner, gathered around the blessing-table, our emptied, sopped-up plates abandoned like islands, our bodies weary from the day, we feast on family. “We should play a game,” Kevin says, and I get up to look in the cabinet where we keep them. Adam follows, towering behind me, swaying like a pendulum. For Adam, stillness […]
156Jan 3, 2020
In the middle of prayer, my friends and I huddled holy around that old table, I hear Riley on the stairs. “Yes,” she says, her pure voice rising sweet with ours, her assent like a clasping hand, an enveloping arm. It’s as though she’s come upon our group hug and wrapped herself around us. And […]
157Dec 20, 2019
The young man meets us in the parking lot, at the spaces reserved for guests. Before we can get out of the car, he’s walking purposefully our way, wearing a t-shirt that says, Welcome. And so it should be with God’s people, always wearing the welcome of Christ, always walking purposefully toward opportunities to love. […]
158Dec 13, 2019
In the garage, on the way in at the end of a bruised up day, Riley has another seizure. Kevin, coming around the other side of the car, sees her stop, notices her sudden silence. He calls her name, and she turns her head but can’t answer. Stuck, her head bobs, like something sinister has […]
159Nov 29, 2019
We stand in a huddled line, breath like mist in the frosty cold, our hands stuffed in our pockets. Seven minutes until the DMV opens, and we wait like a semi-orderly herd of sleepy sheep staring expectantly at a storefront door. “If we had a YouTube channel, this would be the episode to watch,” I […]
160Nov 22, 2019
Riley and I sit against the foot board of the guest room bed, Shaker planks pressing into our backs. “How long will the tornado warning last?” She asks me, looking over at my phone, the radar map I’m scrolling. I stare at the blobs of color–red, yellow, green, spreading them bigger with my fingers to […]