21Feb 15, 2013
“What about innocent children with cancer? Where is god then.” There it is, questioning bold, just below this image: It’s a question for which there are no easy answers, one even believers ask when innocents suffer. Where is the throne of God, the Almighty King, loving, faithful, when this world doesn’t look much like a […]
22Dec 21, 2012
3 am and I wake with a gasp, resurrected from deep sleep. I am so tired that the word tired doesn’t quite work. Trampled might be better. It is an unlikely night for a victory. Adam stands next to my bed, shifting, trying for words. I’m not sure if he touched me or if I […]
23Dec 7, 2012
“DKA (diabetic ketoacidosis) is a medical emergency, and without treatment it can lead to death.” This truth makes me shudder as I kneel beside my son and scrub the leg of his jeans where he points, where some of the toxic sickness missed the bucket beside him and soiled his clothes. Sick Adam is strong, […]
24Aug 31, 2012
The waiting settles in—somewhere deep in my bones—laying a heavy hand against my eyes, clouding everything like the veil of early morning fog blanketing the horizon, obscuring the sharp lines of roof tops, cloaking the striving limbs of the trees. Two and a half hours at the doctor’s office, and I come home to dirty […]
25Jun 1, 2012
Gratitude wells up, flowing out well beyond words, thanksgiving offered open-palmed to YHWH, Elohim, El Shaddai, the lover of my soul, the One who teaches me how to see, the One who never lets me look away. ~*~ I admit it: Sometimes life hits me, smack in the middle of the day when I […]
26May 18, 2012
I live my life on an unpredictable sea. I’m guessing, but I think maybe you do too. Storms come without warning, and I fly overboard, plunged beneath the swells. Mother’s Day, and I sit at the table with Adam while Kevin puts the finishing touches on lunch–the beef stroganoff that has been simmering in the […]
27Feb 10, 2012
Thursday morning, I push a table knife right through the bottom of a glass jelly jar. Nothing shatters. Nothing cracks. The knife jabs in more deeply than it should. And turning the jar upward on a diagonal, I see the flat, silver, jelly-smeared tip of my knife jutting messy through a rounded, toothless gape, all […]
28Sep 23, 2011
As a little girl, I spent hours outside, running wild with the wind. I lived in a house on the marsh of the Lowcountry, where the coming of rain smelled of pluff mud and rotting marsh grass, and humidity lay thick like a hand on my cheek. I played arm in arm with Summer heat, imagination […]
29Sep 16, 2011
On Sunday, I felt the trembling, electric surge of deep knowledge, my breath catching in my throat as I held Zoe’s hand—too thin, the bones too visible, the skin cold and wrinkling. I fumbled with Adam’s glucose meter, putting in a strip. I changed the lancet in the tester so that I could prick her […]
30Feb 4, 2011
Let us not grow weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. ~Galatians 6:9 Sometimes I feel so weary. These are the days when I feel the truth of my inadequacy, and also the best days for acknowledging the reality of God’s tremendous […]